May 2009
30 posts
no reason to love.
i never thought love was something, that i was worthy of, didn’t love for the right reasons, until i realized there needn’t be a reason to love. and i didn’t know i loved you until i saw you at your worst, because when other people walked away, i could only think of you first. it’s not a love that’s so great, but one that’ll never tire, a steady burning flame, rather than some short lived desire....
a mystery.
when the person you can never forget, doesn’t remember your name, you’re completely intact, but it hurts all the same. how can you let me go so casually, when you were the center of my galaxy? how come you can’t see me, when i can’t look away? it took me a thousand nights just to smile again, but you’re fine in just a day. now i find out how much i meant to you. actually, how much i did not....
backwards frown.
i tried to smile today, but it was just a backwards frown. it was stupid of me to stand in the rain, wearing a paper crown. the smallest things create the largest shadows. there are better days, and i’ve had those. but today is in question, and no answer in reach. i have two hands, strength in each, but neither can hold on when the world turns its back. how do you climb, when you’re always picking...
addicted to your nature.
i am the addict of your nature, that composes who you are, when i’m troubled and restless, this is who you are. you are the pulse in the wind, the veins in the sea. you are the color in my eye, the life in me. you are the source of my sustenance, the roots to my tree. the dark between the stars only contrast your beauty. you are the aberrant breeze of a hundred sighs, you are the refracted...
how you live.
avoid hesitation and you will walk without fear, make light of your worries and they will disappear. darkness cannot abide in a mind illuminated, sadness will not exist in a heart that’s elated. talk to understand and listen to acknowledge. be wary of the fall but be familiar with the edge. let go of what happened and remember the present. a gift from the past, time already spent. devour...
what to do.
i love you, but can’t bring myself to say it. there’s intent in my heart, but no way to convey it. love is the most disturbing feeling i’ve ever felt, which drowns my eyes as my insides melt. it’s always on the tip of my tongue, in every little breath, in each lung. but before the words get too far, they turn into something bizarre. stories, and excuses, never how i truly feel. love is something i...
why him, and not me.
i wish i could give you that unsettling feeling that you tell me he gives you. the unsettling feeling that you give me and i subdue. why can’t i light up your eyes the way he does? but i only accentuate where his light was. where does he get this power to make you cry, to make you laugh? any laughter i give you is only on his behalf. for once, can i be the one in front of your smile, instead of...
how i want to be remembered.
one day we all reach that final date. when i leave, however soon or late, i want to be remembered for what i did, not didn’t do. how i did steered away from fiction, and always spoke fact, and the things i did had positive impact. how i was angry for the right reasons, and always stayed true to me. how i spent my time, on what was priority. how other’s happiness was enough reward, and i did my...
a romantic tale.
you’re the main character in this romantic tale, and you have no clue. all throughout this love story, it’s you i pursue. how you threw my world out of orbit, and i sacrificed everything for you. you turned my skies green, and colored my earth blue. from you started the end to all that i knew, we met and i started my life anew. there was a line between me and you that i drew, made up of memories...
letters stain.
i debated for a bit before posting this. because i know people who actually know me will confront me about it. but i decided that i don’t write for your enjoyment, reader. however selfish that may seem. i write for my own salvation. so, forgive me.
my life is falling to pieces, and what’s scary, is that i don’t think i care. i’m tired of shouldering these burdens i bear. there, i said it. i...
your decision.
keep your chin down and arms tucked in. jump off the ledge and dive right in. swim through your sorrows and come up for air. drown your inhibitions, do whatever you dare. in every obstacle there is a miracle concealed. doesn’t mean you should wait for it to be revealed. just pull back the curtains and discover it on your own. take it for granted, happiness isn’t a loan. just take your problems one...
every time.
every time i hug her, a piece of me sticks to her. she is my focus, life without her is a blur. every time i let go, i lose a piece of me. life without her is prison, she is the key that sets me free. every time i see her, the rest of the world disappears. life with her is my courage, the bane to all my fears. every time i feel her, i’m a blind man given sight. when nothing else is left, she’s the...
bitter advice.
after all the places we’ve been to, all the things that we’ve been through, you left me utterly stranded. so now you become candid, this is who you really are. the perpetual fresh sting of my still healing scar. i didn’t mean to hurt you, you say, but it doesn’t reach your eyes. the lack of sincerity is evident, whatever your voice denies. i’m sorry for that day that i stopped and said hello. i...
a fragile gift.
be careful with that lady, that thing you hold in your hands. if you nurture it carefully, it expands. it’s not solid nor liquid, yet it breaks and bleeds. if you pay it no mind, it will be overcome by weeds. but if you tend to it, and feed it kisses once in a while, it can’t help but grow in soil fertile. it was given to you so that you might see, just how much you mean to me. it’s my heart lady,...
mediocre joker.
you are my sweetest dreams released, the proverbial beauty to my beast. excuse me if i don’t think i deserve this bliss as i am not someone that is hard to dismiss. i am far from decent, to be honest. far from worthy, to be humble. i am the sore thumb in any finger ensemble. this i know, that i’m hardly suitable for the lady who is the epitome of beautiful. i know that i should let you go to some...
melodical bits of you.
there’s this empty space between my chest and my spine, i fill it with my music, and i’m doing just fine. you never gave me your heart, although i already gave you mine. but i will construct another from these melodies divine. though i say this, you are a part of every single note, you were the basis from which began everything i wrote. so in some way my heart is made from bits of you, so in some...
heart boats.
if you fell, i’d fall with you. you smell like the breeze that dried my tears, and lingered after. you give me back what i imagine was the sound of my childhood laughter. i saw you today, and you made my mind stutter. like the dreams of a caterpillar, you made something inside flutter. hopefully this will lead to something eternal, because all great things, start with a small kernel. we could...
in plain sight.
i’m here in plain sight, but you still don’t see me. lost in a past night, stuck on a note solitary. because if i move past that, i must find a new reason to breathe. you were that reason for me, my reason to believe. you were what inspired me, when everything else failed. my unbreakable shelter, when the skies hailed. my place of solace, my retreat, my relief. even in the darkest of times, you...
just another face.
i want to mean more to you, not just another face. i want to be your color, not just another trace. i want to be there on your happiest night, i want to be the one to make you happy on that night. i want to be there on your saddest day, the one to pat you on your head and tell you everything’s going to be okay. i want to know that you trust me completely, i want to know you so well, i can look...
why i write.
i found my inspiration to write again. she stirs something in me, deep within. to my parched throat, the hidden well. i’d like to fill my lungs with her smell. the sight of her makes my eyes tingle. i’d give her more than one heart, had i more than the single. she makes me happy, and that’s all i require. she inspires me to heights higher, and in the clouds i’m breathless. to my structured life,...
time.
i’m not living anymore, this is merely survival. sleep is my dearest friend, time is my rival. in dreams i am let free to be whoever i’d like. but time passes unconvinced, a steady strike. in the dark night, time is suspended, but even the night will eventually be ended. then i do what i have to, to survive until the sun dies. then i can be happily lost, and do whatever time denies. someday, i...
a done deal.
my feet are sore from walking, my mouth sore from talking, my head sore from thinking, my heart sore from linking myself to another who drags me through dirt with no consideration. hey, would you mind? maybe a little bit of appreciation. i’m covered with calluses where i have been scarred, but i still don’t like the way you hurt me with blatant disregard. keep in mind, please, i’m a person too....
if someone loves you.
if someone takes every upside down thing you’ve done, and turns it right side up in that someone’s mind, that someone loves you. if someone manages to crank out a smile for you, in the most ridiculous of situations because that someone knows you need it, that someone loves you. if someone hurts when that someone sees you hurting yourself, that someone loves you. if someone won’t always let you...
tinkering about.
i write to instill my will, and build my skill, as my quill drinks its fill of the ink of my thoughts that race, run with a frenzied pace. wielding my weapon between forefinger and thumb, i struggle to juggle my muse’s dictum. she recites with fury, her lips become blurry, my pen always pressured against the page, my ink measured with a gauge only limited by time and its implacable soldiers, that...
your worth is.
heart to heart, soul to soul, when two become one, one becomes whole. without you i’d be incomplete, like a vocal separated from its beat. yours am i, for as long as i exist. from the moment we met, the first time we kissed. like a key and its lock, you’re an exact fit, and i love you completely, every single little bit. and it’s the little things that i miss most of all, i will treasure every...
mirrored me.
i dream so fervently, i’ve forgotten which is me. am i the one who is looking, or the one i can see? at first i think the person in the mirror is a reflection of me, but then i realize the mirror is a line of symmetry. so my reflection is me but an axis away. even so, when i go, he doesn’t stay. in the world of the mirror does this me do what i do? has he had his heart broken by a mirror you? if...
i am yours, i have yours.
i wasn’t trying to fall in love with you, it just happened. you became this love when before you were just that friend. somehow you managed to find your way into my head, and traveled my dreams as i laid in my bed. it was a surprise, a pleasant one though. how my days went better after hearing your hello. the way food tastes better now when you’re there enjoying it too, and how even boring becomes...
the happy disease.
smiles are contagious like an incurable infection. it is the simplest form of language, a universal connection. they indicate communion, a shared conflagration of joy. the strongest shield and sharpest sword to employ. a projectile that needs no particular aim, even those a smile isn’t directed at, are affected all the same. nothing more than a basic facial expression, and yet the greatest...
just a friend.
i am the shoulder that you lean on. i am the smile that lifts you up when you’re down, the frown that prevents rash decisions. i am the sweater that keeps you warm. i am the words of truth when you need to, but don’t want to hear them. i am the laugh of appreciation, the grin of an inside joke. i am the worried voice when you go missing. i am the gifts that you’ll treasure forever. i am the hands...
the dangers of being wrong.
when you’re wrong, you’re in danger of learning what is right. when you’re wrong, you risk seeing things in a totally different light. there’s nothing wrong with being wrong, unless you’re unwilling to be not right, knowledge is a cure, don’t turn it into a fight. even then, no need to have a rude battle, when you can have a civil war. know when you’re wrong, and you’ll unlock wisdom’s door....
